Faster Cycle

Dear Floyd,

Anyone watching you saw shades of Lance in your 17th stage comeback — a spectacular feat of athleticism by any standard. At a time when there’s little to cheer about, all Americans were proud to see you prevail…in France, especially.

Today, however, our pride has turned to bewilderment and dismay from the latest revelations of enhanced levels of “synthetic” testosterone in your bloodstream. (I’m sure there were plenty of guys out there hoping that your initial explanation of elevated testosterone naturally caused your super human performance.)

Today, we hear you gripe about the “agenda” of cycling’s governing bodies. You complain about not having sufficient time to react to the public release of your lab test results.

“I just got the information on the ‘A’ sample a day and half ago…I had to find out about the ‘B’ from reading it in the media…I had only two days to react to mine.”

Floyd, shame on your PR consiglieres for not having their RSS readers or a Google News Alerts keyworded to capture breaking news about your fate. Had they taken the easy steps to set up these digital testosterone tools, the tainted test results might have found their way into your inbox, thus allowing more time to react in the first news cycle.

Now you really have to spin some wheels with a full-out media blitz just to catch up…

Best of luck.

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